dude we already knew

The gayborhood really needs to house all those machismo-masked men who keep driving in late at night. The fathers of masculinity damn-well ruined it for them. Such claustrophobic options for manhood. Sigh.

Society will function without your hetero facade dude. So c’mon, fuck patriarchy (i won’t even place a joke here) and live your life free of construction. It’s empowering and you’ll still be a star quarterback. I promise. 

Oh and if I find out you’ve been rummaging in my hole, searching for the fountain of straight. I’ll kill you. I promise.

Come out, come out wherever you are.